


Awfully Silent

by Damewhore



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: M/M, OTP Feels, One Shot, Sad, Sad Ending, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-18
Updated: 2019-11-18
Packaged: 2021-02-12 15:42:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21478807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Damewhore/pseuds/Damewhore
Summary: The silence after the battle is the loudest part.
Relationships: Poe Dameron & Finn, Poe Dameron/Finn
Comments: 1
Kudos: 38





	Awfully Silent

**Author's Note:**

> Hello Everyone! This is my first fic in ao3 and i hope you all enjoy it!

Everything was on fire. Chaos surrounded everything his eyes caught and it breathed in his heart. His mind couldn’t adjust all that was happening.

Until one memory woke him up.

_ Where is Poe._

Finn quickly tried to get up but a sharp pain in his leg threw him to the ground again.

_ Fuck_ he breathed.

Looks like one of the stormtrooper’s blaster got him. _Come on Finn concentrate. What happened here._

And then he remembered it all.

The surprise attack.

The star destroyers.

The blasters.

The fire.

The earth shaking.

And then **the memory** came to him. It was right after the attack.

* * *

_ ** “Finn! Finn i need you to load those transports immediately! We don’t have time!” Poe had to shout to be heard from all the blasters and screams. They were walking fast, almost running.** _

_ ** “What will you do?!” Finn shouted back as loud as he could.** _

_ ** “I’ll lead the attack up there!” Poe responded and raised his finger to the sky.** _

_ ** What? Finn thought and immediately grabbed Poe’s arm. He grabbed him so tight that he wasn’t sure if Poe stopped because he was shocked or if just Finn was this strong. He was facing him now. He was so close. Finn didn’t let go and Poe made no move to free his hand. ** _

_ **“Poe no. Fuck no. I won’t let you go to a fucking suicide mission by yourself!” ** _

_ **“Finn the squadrons will have my back-” ** _

_ **“Are you fucking listening to yourself right now? Are you nuts? There’s no fight up there. We’re talking about dozens of star destroyers and hundreds of tie fighters! What do you got? About 20 x-wings? There’s no fight to win up there and i won’t let you do this. You’ll stay down here with me and help me load the transports.” ** _

_ **Poe locked his eyes to his. Finn was desperately trying to read them. Was he scared? Angry? ** _

_ **Poe remained silent. Slowly, tears filled his eyes.** _

_ ** “I…” ** _

_ **Finn almost whispered in shock when he realised what was going on. “You already know this.” ** _

_ **He took some steps back. He needed air. How the fuck does he need air, they’re outside. ** _

_ **“Finn” ** _

_ **“You don’t plan on coming back” ** _

_ **“Finn” Poe tried to reach out.** _

_ ** “Don’t touch me!” ** _

_ **Poe’s hands were shaking. His eyes were red and full of tears now. Finn felt dizzy.** _

_ ** “Poe please.” He begged. “You don’t have to do this.” ** _

_ **“Someone has to.” ** _

_ **“Why?! Why does that have to be you?!” ** _

_ **“Because!” Poe cried out “Leia left the resistance to me Finn. To me. The pilots trust me. I can’t let them all die while me, their leader, is down here safe and hiding” ** _

_ **Finn’s anger was almost driving him mad.** _

_ ** “That’s what you think i’ll do? Hide?!” ** _

_ **“Finn that’s not what i mean and you know it. You know i can’t leave them.” ** _

_ **Finn felt tears brushing his cheeks. When did he even start crying? ** _

_ **He wanted to beg Poe to stay. Hell, this couldn’t be real. But he knew Poe more than anyone in this world. He knew nothing and no one would change his mind. ** _

_ **“Dameron!” Someone yelled. Probably Jess. “It’s time to go!” ** _

_ **No one moved. ** _

_ **“Poe?! Did you hear me?! We need to leave right now!” ** _

_ **This can’t be happening.** _

_ ** Poe slowly closed his eyes. Then he softly took off his ring necklace. Finn knew about the ring. Poe always loved talking about his mother. The great pilot of the Rebel Alliance.** _

_ ** He took a deep breath and came as close to Finn as possible. Then he took Finn’s hands into his own and placed the ring into them, squeezing them tight. ** _

_ **“No” ** _

_ **“Finn please” ** _

_ **“I can’t” Finn was crying now.** _

_ ** “Dameron!! We need to leave now!” ** _

_ **“It’s yours” ** _

_ **Poe’s voice was completely cracked.** _

_ ** Finn couldn’t understand if he was mad or broken. Maybe both.** _

_ ** “I’ll keep this with a promise. Promise me you’ll come and take it back. Do you understand me?” ** _

_ **Poe smiled sadly. ** _

_ **“I promise.” ** _

_ **Finn knew he was lying. But he didn’t care. He grabbed Poe’s face and kissed him.** _

_ ** There was nothing soft or elegant about that kiss. It was full of anger, sadness and despair. Finn could almost taste the salt from their tears.** _

_ ** “Poe! Poe!! We need to get going!” ** _

_ **They broke the kiss, their foreheads touching and their eyes still closed.** _

_ ** With a quick move Poe left.** _

_ ** He just left. ** _

_ **He left.** _

* * *

Everything after that is a giant blur. Finn was fighting and loading up transports and trying to survive.

He couldn’t remember how he passed out or when he got shot. It took all the strength he had left to manage to get up.

“Poe!” He shouted and then felt completely stupid. Poe was in his x-wing in the air the last time he saw him how the fuck would he ever hear him.

_ But hold on._

Finn realised that even tho there was fire and wreckage everywhere, it was silent.

_ Awfully silent._

Where are the ships. Where are the tie fighters and the star destroyers.

And the x-wings.

“No” Finn breathed to himself.

_ Please no._

He started shouting and screaming like he hasn’t have in his entire life.

“Poe!?! Jess?! Does anybody hear me?!” He tried to run but his wound made it almost impossible.

Almost.

“Poe!? Poe can you hear me?!”

He eyes were tearing up again and he couldn’t tell if it was just because of the smoke.

“Help! Is anybody-”

“Finn?! Finn over here!”

Finn turned around to see Rose. She seemed okay and she was helping Connix stand up.

He walked as fast as he could towards them.

“Rose where are the pilots?”

She gave him a questionable look.

“The pilots? I don’t know who survived Finn. I don’t even know where the loaded transports are-”

“Rose please, you must have seen something. They were trying to keep the tie fighters away from the transports. Did you see what happened afterwards?”

Rose shook her head. She opened her mouth to say something when Connix told him the one thing that hit him harder than the blaster. The one thing that took all his strength away. The one thing that completely and utterly _broke_ him to pieces.

“Finn. All the x-wings were taken down trying to defend the base. Didn’t you see it?”

He couldn’t breathe.

“No. Connix someone must have survived.”

“Finn the pilots were in the first line. Poe’s plan was to keep the tie fighters away from the transports at any cost. Any cost Finn. And they did.”

Finn was in denial.

“No. No no no no no. You’re wrong.”

Rose was looking at him with a soft expression in her eyes, like she was sorry for him.

“Finn-”

“I said no Rose! No! Poe promised he’ll come back! Do you hear me? He promised me!”

He fell to the ground, holding Poe’s ring tight.

“He promised me.” He sobbed.

_ No. This can’t be real. Everything is silent and there’s sun everywhere and it’s a good day and the resistance had won. If Poe was truly gone it wouldn’t be like this. The sun wouldn’t shine like this._

“Rose can’t you see?” he didn’t even know if Rose could understand him, under all the sobbing and crying.

“Poe can’t be gone. He can’t just- No! He wouldn’t leave me without saying goodbye”

The last two words were a big fucking lie, he realised and the the ring in his palm was the evidence.

_No_.

Words couldn’t come out anymore. All he could do was hold the ring and cry. And sob.

For they had won, but for him,

_everything_ was lost.


End file.
